Amalia Oliva Rojas

from How to Melt ICE

TIA EUGENIA

The problem with being a lizard, amigo is that you’re expected to be cold blooded the entire time.
Even when the warmth tries to caress your heart. 
Even when something bad happens. 
You’re expected to not react, just accept. 
Do you remember your first love? How did they seem like forever? 
Yeah. I do too. 
This country was my first love. 
The first taste of warmth. 
The first time I felt joy so much it felt like wind had found its way under my wings. 
The way my heart skipped several beats when Cristina told me we were leaving Mexico.
I ran to my room and I made a list of all the things I wanted to do when I got here. 
A road map. Guidance for myself. 
A love letter. 
We had dreams for Ximena and Memo, but I never let go of mine the way you haven’t let go of yours.
New York seemed like ...home… my forever.
Sometimes I see her in my dreams. The Statue of Liberty. 
She was the first thing we saw when we came to New York City. 
When we locked eyes I saw all the things I wanted to be. 
But then...as time slipped by she showed up in my dreams and her face it began to taunt me. 
Her words were fast and sometimes I couldn’t keep up... 
But then she slowed down and spoke straight to me.
Give me your cold
Give me your tired and poor 
Give me your work
Your tears
Your dreams
My torch will guide you towards the American dream 
Come, follow me.
And I’d reached towards her, but I couldn’t hold on. 
And then I always wake up...and I watch tv.
I watch the actors, the actor that could be me. 
And I look around me and I’m still here.
Waiting for my love to love me back.
I know what you’re thinking... you work at a cantina, you’re just a street vendor
What makes you think I don’t have any dreams?
What made you think I don’t have any dreams? 
La Malinche trusted Cortez. 
And America, I trusted you.

How to Melt ICE was produced at the Julia De Burgos Cultural Arts Center